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Memo #1: Empathy
Human Relations Competence: Some principles and essential skills for maintaining healthy relationships, ergo, reducing your daily stress…#1
The emotional intelligence factor that separates the narcissist (one who excessively focuses on and admires him/herself) from the rest of us “average” human beings is the ability to demonstrate empathy for another person’s experience.
Empathy means that you are able to “tune in” to another person’s situation, circumstances, motives, feelings. It means that you respect differences and that you have compassion for others. Of course, in the process of tuning in, your attention will not be on yourself or “Hey, what’s in this for me?”. Instead, if you have empathy, it’s all about the other person, at least for the time being. Your listening and attending skills will trump any yearning you have to carry the conversation or “make your point.” Your patience and verbal responses will help the other person believe that you are genuine in your concern. Mutual empathy is the one indispensable condition for a quality relationship, and demonstrating empathy is the indispensable skill for successful workplace and classroom relationships.
Dr. Bettie Tully, El Centro College, 2-6-06
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